Here is a list of 9 different types of biker you will meet when you are out or when you stop for a coffee. Its tongue in cheek so try not to be too offended!!!

1.Old Pan Man

OK, Old Pan man doesn’t care… he just wants to ride, he doesn’t care what he’s on. He rocks up on his 1998 ST1100 Pan European with it roller brush paint job and stickers from far flug places. His bike has 80,000 miles on the clock and duck tape in questionable positions. You have to admire his abilty to get the ‘old girl’ through its MOT with a combination of Hammerite on the swing arm, to cover rust and zip ties holding his rear brake in place.

2.Harley Man

£20,000 of American muscle… for the streets of Batley. Will have about 3,000 miles on the clock after 10 years, after all Harley Man only brings his bike out in Californian weather…. which is twice a year in the UK. Everything that glimmers is chrome, the paintwork is immaculate. He is decked head to foot in Harley Davidson merchandise (see ‘Brand Man’) as the sales person absolutely saw he coming. Nice guy though, thinking he’s living the rebel lifestyle…. even though he’s an accountant.

3.Not Harley Man

Can’t afford a Harley or thinks a Japanese replica is close enough. Hint’s of rust on his Kawasaki VN1500 or Honda VT1100 covered by cheap Chinese chrome ‘ornaments’. Loud straight through exhaust is a must, spends a lot of time playing with the idle speed trying to replicate the ‘Potato Potato’ sound of a Harley. Gets a little miffed when asked ‘Is that a Harley’ that he has to explain that is a Honda.

4.Bobber Man

Watches too much ‘American Chopper’ and thinks ‘I can do what they do’. Buys an Old ‘spares or repair’ Harley or Jap Cruiser and sets about with a Reciprocating Saw chopping pieces off. You can see the welds where pieces he didn’t want to chop off have been re attached. Had a £3000 paint job done on the tank leaving no money for anything else so that engine has VHT paint sprayed…. badly…. and exhaust wraps to cover the manky rusting exhausts. Wears a vest…. over his jacket …. for some reason.

5.The Power Ranger

Has a (no more than) 1 year old litre sports bike. Wears a white all in one race suit, white boots and white gloves. His suit has the largest branding ‘ALPINESTARS’ or ‘DAINESE’ you will ever see and a ‘Rossi Replica’ helmet. The centre of his tyres are flattened out and his chicken strips so wide pilots mistake them for a runway. Very loud. Big fan of ‘banter’ Drives a Subaru Impreza.

6. GS Man

Rides a bike that is not fast (you’d buy a sports bike), doesn’t really handle (a sports tourer maybe?) isn’t an off roader without a tyre change (just by an off roader if you want to go off road) doesn’t look good (buy literally any think else) and has what look like cases for holding a dangerous substance in a disaster movie as panniers (if you want to tour buy a tourer). Wears full textile ‘off road’ gear for riding the A6749 usually with ‘BMW’ all over. Thinks Ewan Mcgregor is the ultimate biker. Tries to keep to himself…. unless he sees another GS rider… which is often. Drives an Audi.

7.Stunt Bike Man

Has a c.2008 litre sports bike…. that was crashed… and then ‘street-fightered’. Wide Renthal bars, stubby levers and end can are a must, as is riding in a strange position with his arms straight. Wears gloves than don’t cover his wrists and Jeans with short boots. And, of course, a white helmet with a ‘seriously can he actually see through that’ dark visor. Pulls into the car park, revs has a look round, then leaves again.

8. Brand Man

My absolute favourite on this list … Brand Man. Brand man can ride anything. A cruiser, A sportsbike, A tourer , An Adventure bike, it can be Honda, Yamaha, Suzuki, Kawasaki, MV, but Brand Man usually has a Ducati, a Harley, a BMW or a Triumph. His bike is brand new, on PCP … with £2000 extra spent in the dealership on manufacturer branded kit. His helmet, his leathers/textiles, even his boots have DUCATI or BMW or HARLEY DAVIDSON, emblazoned all over it. Here is my advice to brand man… if you want to show your love for a particular Manufacturer…. buy a T-Shirt, get your gear separate in a Bike clothing store… but I suppose you can’t get that on PCP can you?

Remember folks, this is tongue in cheek…. Ride what you want to ride, wear what you want to wear and pay no attention to a bloke who looks like he’s riding a Mini Moto when out on his sports bike.

I am now the owner for a Ducati 749. I absolutely love it. In a future post I will tell you much, but for now lets talk about the Ducati and the motorcycles they produce, or should that be … lets talk about Audi … and the Motorcycles they produce.

Let’s first look at a little bit of Ducati history.

The Motorcycle manufacturer from Bologna grew from the ashes of the the second world war. Prior to Hitlers decision to go a bit nuts and plunge the world into war, they had manufactured electronics. Knowing Italians now had no money to buy expensive electronics, they went into producing small 50cc engines that clipped to push bikes, this in Turn led to the Cucciolo, Ducati’s first ever production bike.

Fabio Taglioni was creating the first Ducati Desmodromic engine, a single cylinder, by 1956, the legendary L-Twin motors arrived in 1972 and in the early 80’s Massimo Tamburini (designer of the 916) introduced the Trellis frame.

Ducati, until 2012, was almost always broke.

However, despite between being passed into Italian Government Ownership, being owned by Cagiva and comically by an American Investment Company (with no history of running a Motorcycle company), they always seemed to produce fantastic motorcycles, many ahead of the times. Ducatis were special, they were different.

Then along came Audi and they no longer are.

In 2012 Lamborghini purchased Ducati. Audi have all the voting shares. I’m sure there is some convoluted and complex reason why, however, I’m not going to get into that. But basically Audi own Ducati.

So, what have they done?

Well, they have increased global sales. In 2010 Ducati sold 36,000 Bikes around the world, by 2019 that was 53,000 and they have created phenomenal motorcycles in the form of the recent Panigale and Multistrada V4’s.

So far, so good, better profitability for an Iconic brand and some fantastic bikes…. so what’s my problem?

The bikes produced today are superb…. but they are not special.

Aprilia have been using V4’s for years, whilst it has slight differences in engine characteristics, its a four cylinder motorcycle, Honda, Kawasaki, Yamaha and Suzuki use four’s.

The lack of a trellis frame means they are no different, certainly appearance wise, to Japanese bikes either. Take a look at the 2021 Ducati Monster next to a Yamaha MT-10, they’re Identical.

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They don’t have dry clutches, look them or hate them, they are destinctive.

Now, the Icing on the cake, new Multistrada V4s, uses valves springs over the Desmo system. So now it is literally just a normal run of the mill four cylinder engine.

Take a look at reviews for many modern Ducati’s, words like ‘passion’ ‘flair’ ‘character’, words used to describe older Dukes, have been replaced by descriptions such as ‘usable’ ‘easy to ride’. Give me strength.

Both my Ducati’s are a pain to ride in town, both stumbling and bumbling as they drop below 2,500 revs. 10mph is a nightmare. Ergonomically, the 749 is comical for the road (you get used to it – honestly). They take a lot of effort to ride at times (ok the 749 take a lot of effort and concentration ALL of the time) but oh the noise, that distinctive L-twin rumble, the ‘brapping’ noise as the revs increase, the precision and most of all that ‘Je ne sais quoi’ feeling from riding them.

I’m never bored on my Ducati’s … never looking forward to getting off. Can the same be said for todays models? I don’t know.

The point is this, Ducati’s are supposed to be special, unique. They are supposed to look and feel different, they are supposed to be a ‘pain in the ass’. They are supposed to have crazy clutches and (some may argue) pointless valve closing systems.

In 2021, a company in Bologna produces some of the best Motorcycles in the world… it’s just they should have an Audi badge not a Ducati one.

I love Motorcycles, you may have noticed. I’ve written entire blog pages about why.

I love my big Royal Star, with its phenomenal 2 up cruising capability, I loved my Hayabusas power, My VTXs rebel looks and V-Twin sound. My VTR1000 Firestorm was a sensational motorcycle, my 1998 R1 even more so. I’ve had everything from the biggest (Goldwings, Royal Star) to the fastest (Hayabusa) and everything inbetween. Cruisers, tourers, sportsbikes and Nakeds…. Honda, Yamaha, Suzuki, Derbi (look them up) all have added up to a rich and diverse range of motorcycles capable of bringing a motorcyling smile to my face.

But, nothing, none of the 20+ motorcycles I have owned, have ever left me so enamoured, as the beautiful red Italian…. My Ducati Multistrada.

On paper it should be awful, but we don’t ride on paper do we? We ride on the road and on the road its unbelievable. Just enough ‘road’ power, with unreal (as in it shouldn’t really do that) handling.

I’ve become obsessed with everything Ducati (I’ve even ordered branded clothing).

So much so, I am already on the lookout for a new one. A 900ss perhaps?

I wanted to dispel a few Ducati myths.

Ducatis are expensive to own.

Well, no, not really. If you can hold a spanner and already service your own bikes, it will cost you slightly more. Ducati dealerships are stupidly expensive and both I contacted wanted to charge my 2 hours labour for what should take a qualified Ducati mechanic 20 minutes. But there is nothing on a Ducati that can’t be done at home. Belts are in the region of £100 (+/- £20), but I don’t think £50 a year should put you off.

Yeah but the belts, aren’t they only to be changed by the mythical few?

I have never seen anything so overhyped in my life. They are timing belts, not the secrets to the origins of the universe. If you can hold a spanner and an allen key, your 2/3rds of the way there.

2v engines (such as the 1000 ds engine in my Multistrada) are the easiest, its more awkward than hard, and from what I can see the 4v (916,748 999 etc) is just as easy to change the actual belts, they’re just buried behind the fairings and battery.

Maybe I’m wrong on the 4v as I’ve not physically touched one, but I’m very confident I’m not.

Valve checking is the same, just a bit of a pain in the backside, but can be done.

So now I search for another one. I want a 748, however, I don’t think Mrs BigV will allow the budget to stretch that far. so its looking like a 900SS may be the way to go, or a monster, or and ST2 or an ST4, any will do to be fair….

Now, i’m off to put the lottery on I want a Superleggera, oh and a Panigale V4 and a 916 and a……….

My Hayabusa is gone. Sold to a dealership (which makes me wonder how much I COULD have sold it for!).

I will miss the big Busa, the way it delivered its power, its relative comfort and the way it looks …. no really.

The Hayabusa was always classed as an ‘Ugly’ motorcycle. I didn’t see it myself. With Its drooping nose, bright blue and silver paintwork and sheer presence, it was no Ducati 916, but good looking none the less.

So she needed to be replaced, a fresh addition to the line up, so, I give you the Ducati Multistrada 1000ds.

Another ‘ugly’ bike I hear you say? Well, no actually and I don’t mind admitting I was a little surprised.

The Multi is actually quite a pretty bike.

My method of purchasing Motorcycles is somewhat risky. I vary rarely have actually seen a bike I’ve purchased before it is delivered/collected. I’ve got a good ear, if I can tell there are engine problems, the bike will be rejected. I’m highly competent with the spanners, so any minor issues can simply be fixed. Test Rides? In my opinion, you learn nothing on a test ride. Bikes have to be ridden on roads you know at a pace you are used to before you can learn anything.

I had seen many pictures of the Multistrada, including pouring over the sellers pictures, so, when it arrived, ill admit I was a little shocked at just how good it looked and this was no buyers giddy.

The trellis frame, the popping red paint the Termignoni exhausts… it looked stunning. Ok, when you turn the handlebars the top part of the fairing moves and it looks gopping, but there’s no real need to position it that way.

The side stand is shocking, far too short for the bike. Pouring through the mountains of service history, you spot what happened with the previous owner. The bike came with scratches on the left side (I was aware of these) and you can see the almost comical situation he’s gone through.

Invoice for new clutch lever and seat fairing repair.

Then

Invoice for new bar ends and Centre Stand.

Clearly its fell over twice, the second time he had had enough and put a new stand on.

I’d checked the weather on delivery day. When she arrived it was gleaming sunshine with a few fluffy white clouds, glorious weather. By 5pm, when I was due to go home, it was pouring down.

Now, I’m happy riding in most conditions. I don’t mind the cold and, whilst I would prefer not to, I don’t mind riding in the rain. But, not on a brand new bike. Not on a bike I have never ridden and certainly not on a bike I have never ridden that has a riding position that is completely alien to me. I don’t mind admitting… I was very nervous. What didn’t help is the brakes felt like they were on/off devices. It felt like there was no progression in the lever. Added to this, a truck or bus had decided to drop its diesel right on the riding line and I had no winter clothing to keep me dry.

I got home, but, I hated that bike.

A good nights sleep, a cup of coffee and a self administered slap in the face, I was ready to take the bike out to work again the next day. The weather was dry, if a little cold, it was almost perfect riding conditions.

I had sorted the brake problem, the bike may have been sat a little, so, a quick dab of brake cleaner and a mild scrub, plus adjusting the adjustments on the levers from 1 to 4 and braking was now a joy.

As i moved on to the country roads, I noticed something I really wasn’t expecting, the Multi handles fantastically. I don’t mean fantastically for a bike of its type, I mean its goes into corners in a manner it really doesn’t have a right to and its effortless.

The engine, whilst weak in comparison to the Hayabusa, is fantastic. It pulls nicely. The riding position lulls you into a false sense of speed. Occasionally, on that first ride, a couple of looks down at the speedo, left me laughing, I’d accelerated far quicker than I thought.

A quick look through the Ducati Forums shows everyone who has one (or had one) loves them. We have to ignore the Motorcycle Press, as they get lazy if bikes are not 200bhp superbikes.

Thanks to the great weather, I’ve been regularly riding the Multistrada to work.

This has led me to a surprising question, one I never expected to be asking my self when I bought it….

Is the Ducati Multistrada the perfect road motorcycle?

On motorways its comfortable and stable. On the twisties, its handling is exemplary. Unless you’re a speed merchant, on first name terms with the local police officers, it is certainly quick enough. You can load it up with panniers and top box and go touring, remove them at your destination and go hit the winding roads to get a knee down. It is tall, giving you a great view of the road ahead and its not a BMW GS copy (as later Multistradas seem to want to be). Its different and despite what people say its a great looking bike.

What more could you want?

How are we all? What a crazy few months this has been! Writing has become almost impossible, what with a 7 year old running around, combined with the lethargy lockdown brought.

For a huge portion of us, we are back, back on the roads, back on our bikes, back in our cars.

I like to write primarily about Motorcycles. Today i’m expanding to include cars.

I know, I know … Tin boxes with no soul, cages that suppress freedom, but, in my life anyway, needed.

We are very lucky (if working damn hard to get what you own is lucky) in our household, we have 3 Motorcycles and 2 cars.

• My BMW 5 Series
• Mrs Bigv’s Volvo V40
• A VTX1300
• A XVZ1300 Venture
• A GSX1300R Hayabusa

Each vehicle is, obviously, different to drive/ride. Each has its own shortcomings and positives. Here is something that may surprise you, each gets a different reaction when its out on the road.

The Hayabusa

Lets start here shall we. To beat the Hayabusa in a 0-60 race, a car would have to cost millions…. Really it would, she may be older (not old, just older) but my word, she’s quick. You could go out and buy a Ferrari, a Lamborghini or any other exotic super car, you are not beating the Hayabusa, so why does Steve in his ‘my car crashed in to an Auto supplier’ think he can?

They pull next to you at the lights, with an exhaust that sounds like it has a hole in it, revving. You hear its tiny little engine hitting the rev limiter as he pulls away, the Busa hardly breaking a sweat, simply and smoothly leaving it behind.

That Aside nobody really bothers the Big Busa. They are usually (even with me riding it) left far behind.

The Venture

The Yamaha XVZ1300 Royal Star Venture is not every motorcyclists favourite bike. ‘

A caravan’ ‘A barge’ ‘a truck’ are some of the comments made by fellow bikers when talking about this behemoth of a Motorcycle, all said with love and in Jest of course.

I love it, its the only one of my three bikes I’m quite happy to ride in the rain, its great long distance and whilst its no R1 in the twisties, its a lovely bike to take a country ride on.

Non-Bikers are amazed by it. This isn’t always a good thing, they stare as they attempt to make a turn, or take on a roundabout. The Venture gets people speeding up and slowing down to have a look on busy highways (no i’m not kidding), is this perhaps the reason, it seems, I can never pull out first time when attempting an overtake an a Motorway?

The Volvo V40

Nadda, nothing. Nobody tailgates, nobody attempts to race, motorists are generally quite polite, letting you out where they can.

When it comes to other motorists, driving the little Volvo is a pleasure. (Its actually, this surprised me, a really lovely car to drive, very ‘German’ despite being Swedish, but enough of that…. its a Tin Box)

The BMW 5 Series

I love my car, Sorry, but its a great car. I’m not quite sure why others seem to have a problem with it though?

I’m mainly talking about drivers of mid to late 00’s, Vauxhals, VWs and Fords.

Tailgating is unreal in this car, almost all of the above seem to ‘want to get past’, drivers of these cars always seem to want to get past you at the lights.

In terms of other drivers behaviour, this car can be a nightmare to drive. The aggressive driving you get when in the BMW is astonishing and at times scary.

I must stress, it’s not all the time, otherwise it would have been sold along time ago.

Why does this happen? I am not so sure. My theory is jealousy.

When you consider then types of cars that cause the most concern, this is all I can think of.

Envy is a very difficult emotion for many to process.

I don’t drive the 5 series, because I’m ‘rich’ (i’m not!), nor because I think I’m better than anyone, I drive it because its lovely to drive, very Balanced, rear wheel drive and has lots of extras.

I may be wrong, maybe it’s not envy, but I simply can’t think of another explanation.

The VTX1300

The reason for this article.

The VTX1300 is now fully bobbered. Its low black and mean, with just enough chrome set against it.

Its not the quickest, but its quick enough and …. it’s loud.

Never in my life have I experienced aggressive behaviour by other road users like I have on this Bike.

It is unbelievable and was not there prior to the conversion from a big cruiser to a big bobber..

There is a stretch of 60mph road on my way home from work, I use it on a regular basis, using all the vehicles listed above and others in the past, with those modes of transport, only real d**k heads would overtake (60mph being the speed limit you can travel the length of the road on).

On the VTX, every male driver wants to get past (again keep in mind i’m nicely cruising along at 60mph) people in Mercs, VWs, Skodas everything… I even had a guy in an VW UP! try it, he pulled in as he would not have made it (i would have, of course, slowed if he’d needed to get back in to avoid a crash)

If there is oncoming traffic they sit, 2 feet from the rear wheel, with unbelievable tailgating ability.

Roundabouts have drivers thinking its the Nurburgring, almost undertaking as I go around.

I have my theories about why it happens with this bike.

Its a challenge to their masculinity.

They’ve watched too much Son’s of Anarchy. They see a Bobber bike with a 6’4″ 17st (235lbs) chap on it, long hair flapping out the back of his helmet and think ‘I’m tougher than him’.

It’s always men by the way.

I’m sure you may have many thoughts about this post.

‘You probably change your own style when changing vehicles’

Maybe, but I don’t think so. Hayabusa aside, I drive and ride in the same ‘progressive’ but steady manner. I’m heavy throttled but don’t race. On the Busa, I like to ‘make good time’ but i’m never aggressive in my riding.

‘Your Theories are bonkers’

Probably, we all use our own perceptions, these theories are the best I can come up with. The reality is there are probably a multitude of reasons for the differences with each Vehicle.

Riding and driving always bring their challenges. I personally think the general standard of Driving in the UK is terrible, people don’t seem to understand they are moving 2 tonnes of steel capable of killing someone.

The way then drive is akin to dancing in a bar holding a 10″ knife.

I still wouldn’t change it, the experience of riding the VTX will never stop me wanting to ride.

There are many negatives to using Britain’s crowed, poorly maintained road network, but we endure, as no matter the road, no matter the traffic…

Nothing beats riding a Motorcycle.

Ok, so to start.. an apology.

Not that this is the most read blog in the history of Motorcycle blogs, so not many will have missed me, but…Sorry for not posting a blog for months! I’ve just been sooo busy.

All three bikes have been out as much as possible over the winter so far. The XVZ1300 Venture has been out the most. Its (believe it or not) the best to ride, out of the three, when the roads are a bit wet. It also offers the best wind and weather protection!

The VTX1300 has been out for a few runs. However, shes a moody big V-Twin, so starting her in the cold is a pain unless the battery is at 100%. The attachment of a trickle charger has helped that.

The Hayabusa has been out on 3 or 4, 6/7 mile rides, just to keep her ticking over. She will be, unfortunately, up for sale soon, the rocket-ship is wasted on me.

I’m looking out for a GL1500 Goldwing, Ill ride it and the Venture over a few months and decide which I like the best, ill only keep one in the end.

A big topic of conversation in the UK at the moment is the installation and use of ‘Smart Motorways’ on the UKs road system.

The BBC are about to (or have already, depending on when you read this) air a program on the subject, apparently it will contain damning statistics about the increase in death and near misses on these new style roads.

So here is my opinion – Smart Motorways are about the most stupid, idiotic and moronic thing EVER on UK roads.

(Some reading may wonder what on Earth I am going on about – ‘What is a Smart Motorway’?

There are two types (Sometimes on the same road) One turns the hard shoulder into a ‘live lane’ during peak traffic. The other limits speed and the speed becomes variable during peak times.)

Who in the world thought ‘Ive got it!, you know the bit at the side of the road, where cars go if they break down….lets make that a lane!’

And guess what? People are dying on them and there a thousands of ‘near misses’.

This isn’t a surprise though is it? At least if you have even a modicum of common sense it shouldn’t be. The lack of a ‘hard’ shoulder means a break down or tyre blow out, leaves you stranded. If you are stranded in a ‘live lane’, you increase your likely hood of being hit. To me, it seems like a straight-forward thing to think.

I’ve had this discussion numerous times on Social media. Including a recent one with a Gentleman who described himself as ‘Ex-Traffic police and a Road Safety consultant’ (On twitter you never know but this seemed a genuine account).

He explained to me how being on a Motorway with out a ‘Hard’ shoulder was no different to being on a dual carriageway. Its not often I am speechless, honestly, ask my fiancee, but this left me gobsmacked.

Dual Carriageways are vastly different beasts to Motorways, volume of traffic (the main reason for having ‘Smart Motorways’) for one. Yet those who a supposed to be knowledgeable, simply don’t seem to be.

I have driven (fortunately not many on a motorcycle, we like the countryside better, don’t we) many hundreds of miles on Smart Motorways. I have a golden rule on them…. I never go in what would have been the (Hard) shoulder.

They have a red ‘X’ indicating when you shouldn’t be driving in them, without fail you will see someone who is, even when they shouldn’t be.

Many have indicated their opinion that they are only dangerous, as people don’t pay attention. In a way, they are right. But people tailgate (the single stupidest thing you can do in/on a vehicle). What on Earth makes the creators of Smart Motorways think suddenly motorists attitudes would change?

Why did they not plan for the stupidity of many Motorists?

My rant about these roads doesn’t end there.

The ‘Variable speed aspect’ is less dangerous, but far more comical.

Put simply, Variable Speed Limits …. do not have the desired effect.

They are designed to improve traffic flow, when the Motorways are busy. I’m willing to bet you on a computer model, that’s exactly what they do. But the M62 (for example) is not a computer model, its real life.

Variable speed limits do the following:-

• Make people brake when they see the speed change
• This causes the person behind to brake …usually just that little bit more
• This starts the accordion effect, each car behind brakes a little more
• Miles down the road, traffic has come to a near stop and you have MORE congestion
• When you pass the incident (or congestion) causing the Variable speed limits to be in effect, you are stuck at 40/50 MPH, so the traffic can’t ‘get going’ and clear.

I have traveled many times through the unmitigated congestion disaster that is the Dartford tunnel and I am convinced if they switched the speed limit gantries off, traffic would actually flow OK.

The crux of the problem is this… Computer models and (so called) Road Safety experts will continue to preach the virtues of the often bizarre and strange road planning we have.

Smart Motorways will maybe get a few extra refuge areas or something else that will not eradicate the issues caused on these roads …. and they will keep building them… and they will keep defending them… and people will keep dying on them…. and they will keep building them… and people will keep defending them….

They don’t work, they never have. Stop trucks overtaking, harsher punishments for tailgating, re-aline roads to allow traffic on and off it an easier manner, this will assist in easing traffic congestion, Smart Motorways never have helped….. and never will.

For those following the progress of my bikes, everything is good this week.

The Venture Rides perfectly now, after a 250 mile journey two-up, it made me realise i have probably over tightened the steering head bearings a touch, a quick tap to loosen them ever so slightly and, hey presto, a perfect riding motorcycle.

This is very good news at the moment, as I sit writing this, it is pouring down with rain and the Venture is without doubt the best bike I’ve ever ridden when wet. So planted and so stable.

The VTX1300 is currently getting paint on the rear fender, that should hopefully be back on the bike in the next few days.

After my last blog, the Hayabusa is sitting in the garage, probably feeling unloved.

I took a bit of a risk with the weather today, choosing to take the Venture to work, despite the iffy weather forecast.

As the big Yamaha is a great mile-muncher, taking the ‘highway’ route (as opposed to the country lanes) still gives an excellent motorcycle ride. The roads were damp when I left, forcing my decision to take the A19 (a major ‘highway’ covering the North East of England down to North Yorkshire). Unfortunately, with no warning, the road was closed sending me the scenic route.

The roads in general were not an issue, they had mostly dried. However one small section really got my goat.

Maybe it was because I feared I may be slightly late, or was it the fact I’d been ‘forced’ on to this section, but I got quite annoyed. Its a mess!

A few years ago they laid it with stones. (Yes, for those reading, who are not in the UK, we have a policy, here in blighty, of just throwing down loose stones on the floor with a sticky tar … then using the cars rolling over it to press it down). Now this cheap, stupid and frankly (when first laid) dangerous layer has worn away, leaving a potted, marked up stretch of road about a mile long.

When they are first laid, on a motorcycle, they are treacherous, your wheel could spin up with the lightest throttle movement, corners must be taken at walking pace.

If you are in a car, say goodbye to any kind of immaculate paint work as the stones flip up everywhere.

Once its ready and the lines repainted, the ‘loose’ feeling is still there as your tyres search for grip.

I was still thinking about this stretch of road when I arrived at work. This lead my mind to wander into other areas, of travelling on the roads, that annoy me.

Cyclists…

Where….. to…… even…… begin.

Lets be clear, if you a using a Bicycle to ride to work, to pick up a few small items from the shop or taking a ride, on the numerous cycle paths for recreational pleasure… fine.

If you are doing the above for environmental purposes …. excellent, because lets face it, even if you deny the existence of man-made climate change, putting less pollutants in the air is just ….well….nice.

However, if you are on a racing Bicycle that Bradley Wiggins would be proud of, in a weird lycra suit (that offers Zero protection in the event of a fall) riding narrow lanes, two by two for your own personal …yes YOUR personal pleasure… You’re a ****.

Imagine any other sporting pleasure taking part in the middle of the road.

Should I get a ball and start playing with it, with friends, on the blind apex of a corner? What about a game of golf? Ill pop down to the aforementioned A19 and start hitting a ball with a 9-iron should I?

Of course I wouldn’t, because it would be inconsiderate to other people.

If you want to ride, with an aim (like work or the shops) fine… but roads are not somewhere you should ‘play’.

Trucks….

I’ve known a few truck drivers, however, I’ve never managed to ask the question….

Why do they insist on taking-over each other on two lane carriageways?

The A1 stretches from North to South in England. Many are dual carriageways, these parts are always jammed with traffic… the reason?….. a Truck travelling at 56mph is overtaking a truck doing 55mph.

It is unbelievably infuriating.

This happens all over the country. In many parts of continental Europe, this is banned. Trucks are to stay in the inside lane as it increases traffic flow. In my experience, this really works.

Thats not everything, tailgaters, lane hoggers, ‘Smart motorways’ ………the list of stupid and needless things on our roads seems endless.

But thats the great thing about riding a Motorcycle.

These things don’t seem to matter as much, its you, your bike and the road…and I love it!

Another busy few weeks in my little motorcycling world.

The XVZ1300 Venture is riding much better. It was unsteady in corners, after a quick and easy (yeah right!!) partial removal of the fairing, it seems the triple clamp pinch bolts on the right fork were loose! Nipped them up, shes more stable. Ill be popping the back wheel (the one with the new tyre on) back in to get the balancing and fitting checked, just to be sure.

The VTX1300 is coming along very nicely. The engine block and part of the crankcase cover is now black with chrome fins. The exhaust headers are also black. I’ve purchased new mufflers, unfortunately, they sent two different exhausts, so i’m waiting for that to be resolved. The only ‘major’ work left is sending the rear fender off for paint. I cant wait to ride her properly!

I’ve been riding cruiser/tourer style bikes for a while now. I don’t know if its just luck, but I’ve never had any one pull out on me from a junction on this type of bike.

Maybe its the noise some make (loud pipes save lives?) or the sheer presence on the road of others, but it had been a long time since i’d had the feeling of sheer terror as you grab the brake, praying you slow enough to swerve away or stop!

This has all changed recently with the Hayabusa. As the Venture and VTX have both been poorly, the Busa has been my mode of transport to work on the few sunny days we’ve had. ….. wow do people not see me!

Most have been easy to handle, with a shake of the head and a tap on the visor (obviously where my eyes are!).

The most recent one was one of the worst near misses I’ve ever had.

Travelling down a wide mostly straight country road, visibility was perfect. I was riding at 60mph, the national limit for this type of road.

I saw a car approach from a junction.. before I even had time to sway the bike (it moves the head light making you more visible) he carried on going and pulled out in front of me. The brakes were grabbed (progressively) hard…. the front end dipped, back brake applied…. the phenomenal stability of the big Suzuki keeping it planted despite the heavy braking… The one reason I didn’t hit him? He immediately moved to the right into a lane that turned in that direction for the next junction….

Time slows in these moments… the car moving away from in front of me and the avoidance of a collision… must have taken 2 or 3 seconds … it felt like a minute… I was still in this ‘hype aware’ state as I moved along side him … My head moved across and down to see him…. to my utter disbelief …. moving back into the lane I’m in! HE STILL HASN’T SEEN ME! …. As he heads toward me … I blip my throttle as I desperately try to avoid him … he’s now an inch from my leg… at the final moment he swings away from me.

This was a very scary moment… but in the midst of all this drama… I felt calm.. in control almost (though I definitely wasn’t!) the quick movements of the bike seemed to flow … like my ‘spidey senses’ had kicked in.

I rode the rest of the way home with out so much as a raised heart rate.

Unfortunately, for my amazing fiance, I think i suffered a bit of delayed shock, getting into a needless argument about housework (of all things!) when I got home. That’s when the realisation of what had happened kicked in.

Now, some, may think ‘well its a Hayabusa’ you are probably riding quicker, that’s why more people pull out on you’. Honestly, thats not the case. The Busa is wasted on me… I have my aforementioned (and suffering!) fiance and an amazing 6 year old at home, I never ride crazy (or too fast).

The next Busa ride will be on a Sunday morning, it’s no good to take to work with it’s limited storage anyway.

As I’ve not been pulled out on, on a loud bike… maybe its time to make the Hayabusa loud? After all, I do indeed believe loud pipes save lives.

Regular readers will know I ride two Bikes. Well over the past couple of weeks that has changed… Its now three.

The VN1500 FI Classic Tourer has been sold to a nice chap from Falkirk, Scotland. In its place have arrived a 2005 Honda VTX 1300 and ..(I can’t quite believe i’m typing this) a Suzuki GSX1300R Hayabusa.

The VTX is a bit of a mess in truth. More than I thought. What I though was surface rust on the header pipe covers, is in fact deeply pitted rust …. they’re buggered.

Its exciting though. It gives me a whole range of possibilities, Im going to paint up the stock exhaust …see how that looks, if it looks ….well, like a painted stock exhaust (a bit crap) then either new black mufflers and a painted exhaust (the actual exhaust not the cover) or a new full system will be needed.

If I don’t blog for two months…assume its the latter option and my good lady has killed me.

The possibilities are endless, with a black exhaust, the engine will need to be black … or should I do black with chrome fins… should the engine covers also be painted…. its all very exciting.

Rest assured, when its finished it a couple of weeks, in will look fantastic.

Then there’s the Hayabusa. A 194Mph rocket ship.

Now I’ll admit, on the train ride to collect her, I was a touch worried. I had read many things about the acceleration and power of the Busa, and much like looking up medical symptoms on-line, it made the tension worse.

Things didn’t get any better when I left the train, the guy’s house was in the middle of no-where, down tight, narrow, twisty back lanes. Was my will up to date?

When I sat astride her for the first time, I was alone (the seller had gone back in to the house) at dusk…In the middle of nowhere…on a poorly tarmacked dusty road, with a bike capable of 0-60mph in 2.47 seconds.

Deep breath, I swallowed hard…. Pulled in the clutch… small bit of gas…gently release the clutch…..and….. oh…wait a minute… It was smooth as silk.

Yes the clutch was a bit stiff (needs bleeding) … I was in a sporty position that I was not used to …. The suspension felt like a plank of wood compared to the Royal Star and the VN1500 … but wow.. It just pulled away with no drama at all. Quick short shift into second and she was purring away.

I’m not a ‘sports bike’ person at all. They are unsuitable, in my eyes, for today’s roads and traffic conditions. However, if one bike were to change my mind on this its the Hayabusa – you can ride it however you like.

Its effortless, the power delivery is silky smooth and before 6,000 rpm not even remotely intimidating. If fact, at this rev range, it feels like the VTR1000 Firestorm I had a few years ago, immediate power, fast enough and lots of fun.

Its over 6,000 rpm this bike is astonishing. Cruise along on an open, straight piece of road with no other cars or junctions… click down a gear or two…. and hold on!

Its like nothing I’ve ever experienced, not on a bike or in a car. Once again the power delivery is smooth and linear … no gaps in the power, no sudden increase or decrease…just pure power.

This sort of thing would be hard to explain to a 1000cc sports bike rider. Any other sports bike i ridden, no matter if its 1000cc or 600cc the power comes in clumps towards the top end – V-twin sports bikes run out of puff at the top end…. This thing has power everywhere.

Its surprisingly comfortable too. The ride home was about 100 miles, i’d anticipated having to stop but I kept riding (Its actually quite a big bike) and was fresh with no stiffness or aches when I got back.

Its a phenomenal machine, yes the shape means it buffets when behind lorries and side-winds aren’t much fun …but…wow….just wow.

So is that it – is my ‘BigV’ moniker now a waste of time? Am I trading in the Royal Star Venture and VTX 1300 for a fleet of sports bikes?

Not in a month of Sundays.

The Hayabusa is wasted on me. Its fun to know its there in the garage and on some days ill want to take it out to feel that power (and I’m very lucky to have that choice), but I love cruiser and touring riding far more.

I haven’t written a piece like this about my other bikes, because it’s far harder to explain what it ‘is’ about riding them. It’s a feeling. A Je ne sais quoi … A peace with the world.. like Yoga or meditating.

On the Busa, every time I see someone on a cruiser, I immediately want to be on mine.

So I can wax lyrical all day about the power and how this bike is … But next to a Big cruiser…. it’s rubbish!